..Shut The Fuck Up

.. tmr's one FUCKING BIG killer. ITAB. didnt bother studying anywae.

Dere it goes again. im back 2 square 1. it hit me right back onto my seat. when will i really pick myself up again. ASSHOLES.

..why r u so far away. do u mean everything tat u said? y didnt u get it. yeah sense of humor. hope u cn pick that up.

TOP-OF-THE-WISH-LIST:
Find myself a corner, wif either my love *ZR* or *u-know-hu*. to smoke and chat the days & nights away. yeah. tats it. its TAT simple. but it'll be a plus if dere's a lil' chivas/vodka . YEAH. TATS LIFE.
when wil tis day come. damnit

ok.kinda boring reading ma blog. CHAO PEOPLE

..never was. and never will be

YO PEOPLE~

haven come here in quite some time...
kk shall 'recall' wat happened in the past few days :

went wif ZR *aka ma love*, ben....to MOS on the 17th..crowded bt fun ^-^

....*SHOOOM* fast-forward to ytd *cuz i cant recall wat happened since tat day* -.-

..went 2 support bert's performance @ scape park...he got in ^^ . Zhao aft announcing the results 2 meet abram 4 movie *the HULK*. nt bad la. free movie + free meal :) bt realli enjoy gg out wif dem la ^^

..had ma POA paper. HAHA. WAT A joke man. did 10% of the it nia. argh. don realli wanna talk abt it man.

juz finished studying my economics. PHEW. half-awake rite nw. pardon me 4 any grammer mistakes cuz im kinda brain-dead now =_=

OKAY. gonna stop here. gg brush teeth/toilet/sleeeeeep.

CHAO PEOPLE =D

lost..BUT found :)

hi ppl...

juz went 2 meet up wif ma love....ZR *tadang...!*

..gav me a 'motivational talk'...WUHOO. im kinda enlightened now ^-^

..aft tat went hm...studied my ITAB *IT Applications in Business*...n here i m, blogging -.-

...love bought me two shirts back from korean....in which both of dem are my favourite....HOODIES =P

*YAWNS* so so tired...wrking @ far east tmr...shit mann.

*YAWNS*~

..talked about sooooo many things with her. brought up ONE important point:though its hard 2 pick urself up again, U HAV 2 DO IT. YES.

kk. gonna slp now. CHAO PEOPLE ^^

..eh?

YO ppl...

ZR's BACK...! WUHOOOO!!! *kla, mayb im over-joyed* bt stil.....YEAH...!

kk, my day:

stayed hm n STUDY ma economics...
OYA, woke up late 4 my CIP visit to the orphanage *initially said to meet 8.30am @ dover MRT*...woke up at 3pm -.-''''''

aft studying......went tiong 4 dinner wif ben...den to tiong park *as usual*...kanna screened.....

k, tat's about my day. wat a great life huh.

CHAO PEOPLE
^-^

Everybody's Fool

hav u ever tried yearning 4 sumbody so bad? tat u cn lose urself totally.

i hav. n stil am. wher hav WEN gone to? its lyke a movie, replaying itself over n over again.

u most probably wont understand a shit im saying, but i don giv a damn either.

Just talked to the fucking counsellor ytd night IN MY LIVING ROOM. tat FUCKING FAT GUY. WAT THE FUCK HE KNOWS ABT ME OR MY LIFE? nobody elses do, let alone him. he talk as if he KNOWS EVERYTHING. YA. FUCK OFF. U CANT SOLVE ANY OF MY PROBS. OK?

do anythin 2 make me feel alive. juz wanna know i hav been to the extremes.

u must be thinking, lets c how long she can last. let me tel ya fuckers, I AM STIL ALIVE. N WIL STIL BE. LOVE ME OR HATE ME, IM HERE TO STAY.


CHAO, MOTHER FUCKERS.

..less is more.i guess.

Hi dere...here again...

went 2 watch KungFu panda *i tink tats the title* wif fren. aft tat went bert's gig the lineup @ plaza singapura .sadly he didnt get in -.-. BUT, NO BIG DEAL THOUGH =)

aft tat went 2 hav dinner ....den here i m, hm.

wel, was wondering, is it true that you cant have the best of both world? perhaps im 'enlightened'' now. having nothing may be the thing 4 me, if u know wat i mean. ^-^ nvr knew things could turn into hatred so fast. im suprised myself. hate me all u want. i don giv a shit :)

AND, im missing ZR lyke shit now....! hw i wish she's right here. so that we can talk abt anything & everthing under the sun. OMG. when's she coming back seh~

k gg slp. Chao ppl. Tc ya.

^-^

..haha. CHEERS 4 sweet revenge. pathetic fucker. idiotic excuses. =)


hav a nice day people =)

...to think tat he'll fall 4 it. haha =)

..hi dere..here again..went town wif ben, kel, keith, dan...watched the Street Festival...
the lead singer of the band was chio man =P

aft tat went purple light..brought along ma bottle of vodka =) had a bet wif my clique. c whether some dumbfuck fall 4 it anot. HAHA. he picked up. n pretend tat dere's no reception. idiot ^-^ got ten bucks for it ^^ THNKS 4 PICKING UP. =D

..uploaded a few photos in ma frenster..

k. tat's my day =)

chao people..!! take care ya

'Too much to ask' by avril lavigne

It's the first time I ever felt this lonely. I wish someone could cure this pain .
It's funny when you think its gonna work out , Til you chose weed over me, you're so lame. I thought you were cool until the point, up until the point you didnt call me when you said you would. I finally figured out you're all the same. Always coming up with some kind of story.

Everytime I try to make you smile, You're always feeling sorry for yourself. Everytime I try to make you laugh, You can't you're too tough, you think you're the best. Is it too much that I'm asking for?

I thought you'd come around when I ignored you ,So I thought you'd have the decency to change. But babe, I guess you didn't take that warning', Cause I'm not about to look at your face again.

Can't you see that you lie to yourself? You can't see the world through a mirror. It wont be too late when the smoke clears', Cause I, I am still here.
But everytime I try to make you smile, You'd always grow up feeling sorry for yourself. Everytime I try to make you laugh. You stand like a stone, alone in your zone . Is it too much that I'm asking for?

Can't find where i am, Lying here, Alone I fear, Afraid of the dark. No one to claim alone again.
Can't you see that you lie to yourself ? You can't see the world through a mirror. It wont be too late when the smoke clears', Cause I, I am still here Everytime I try to make you smile, You're always feeling sorry for yourself . Everytime I try to make you laugh, You can't, You're too tough, You think you're the best.
It was too much that I'm asking for

..wher's her toothpaste =P

...My god..

though its last night, m posting todae =D ZR called me @ 10pm plus....SHE WAS OREADY AT THE AIRPORT...!!!

haha. tat girl. realli luv her sia. Asked me to guess what was confisticated from her as she was crossing the so-called gates. had my bet on something associated with metal. WRONG.
...............its her TOOTHPASTE. =_=. WTH. told her tat's y those people hu comes outta the plane dont open their mouths -.-
its ridiculous la. wat fucking rule is tat man.

going to miss her so bloody lots. FUCK. *though she will be outta sgp for 2 wks*. BUT STIL. its okie =) gg 2 party on the night after she's back =) wuhoo~ m so so lookin 4ward 2 it man.

k gonna stop here. bye people...
Oo.btw, mark my words : karma, baby.

..now i get the answer.

.. well u've crossed the line =) see ur true colours at last. thnks so much. im not sad, trust me. its more of a disappointment. all the fucking promises, fuck dem all. they're complete bullshit, let me tel u tat.

Haha. wat a joke. remembering the time when u said im urs, cant believe i fucking convinced myself tat its true. lol. funny. i dont know the reason y ur acting tis way. but i guess now im nt interested to know either. hw abt creatin all those stupid drawings tt we put on our msn DP? wher hav dese bloody days gone to. wat a joke

..am wondering wher those cryings to my frens leaded to. u nvr know. cause u nvr cared. whenever my phone gets a message, u'll nvr imagine hw much i hope its from u. but sadly, no. its not ur name on the screen. n wat the fuck cn i do? i cn onli shut the fuck up, close the drawer, n get my ass to work. is it too much to ask for? i juz want to know tat ur alright. tats all. fk it. haha.

yeah sure, ur bz. with ur fucking frenster. the comments and shit. i cn see tat. everyone else cn see tat. hah. shud hav taken ZR's advice. y didnt i . moron me. wanted to tell u so much, so much more. yet, well, guess its the end. perhaps im not even close to your expectations of a gal. i dont know. tot tat we culd spent the holiday together. but, well. =)
Like wat people say, wat goes around , comes around =)

Hav a nice day, to whoever tt knows hu im saying all these craps to. Opps. sry. i 4got . CUT THE CRAP.

chao people ^-^

..i see.

..seems lyke wat ZR said turns out 2 be true. so true.

but it made me see ur true colours. thnks . nvr knew u were sumbody TAT fucked-up.

yeah ur so busy. busy adding gals in frenster.

god bless then. hav a nice day

chao people.

the grunge wil b here. 4ever

y cant he juz die ? fuckin get outta my life. shud fuckin do him in for 2 yrs tat night. y didnt i do it. wen cui, you r a moron, fucking fool.

see. history stil repeats itself. why. why cant u even understand such a simple logic. u hav problem, face up to it, defeat it, fucking move on. what the fuck is so difficult abt tat. its lyke a nvr ending nightmare tat nobody wuld understand. comes back 2 haunt me every now & then.

god. if u cn hear or see me, pls take me away fr these shits. i had enuf. im so tired of being a player in your small little game called life. pls.
juz let me go.

.. *no-comment*

HI dere... (k gonna find a new opening line.) anywae was late 4 klass todae...overslept *as usual =P

SIAN SEH. looong dae tmr again. LUCKILY bestie's crashing ma lecture ^-^ OMG. am so so looking 4ward to it lor. WUHOOO....!

hmmm. k. i shall talk abt the food i had todae. went 2 study wif ben @ tiong aft sch. STUDY. as in realli study k =_= . the beef patty in the burger was like half-uncooked la. my god. I DIDNT ASK 4 ANY SPECIAL ORDERS K. yikes. bloody beef lo. *luckily i up-sized my onion rings*

....k la. guess ur nt interested in all dese. BUT, HEY. TIS MA BLOG K =D jk.

donno wher tat fucking BF is sial. say wat he knocked off oready. waitin 4 him 2 go online. STIL NT YET. cb seh. FARIS = stupid/moron/idiotic ASS ^-^ but stil, wonder y i KINDA mis ya. STUPID ASSHOLE.

fk la. he' having his common test nxt wk. GREAT. MORE FREEDOM 4 ME Y(^-^).

....Kla, kiddin onli. asshole. know u'll b reading tis k =) *mis ya fucking lots*

(sch) a little comment : i hope things realli ARE getting betta 4 me, if u know wat i mean. HOPE =)

am listening to Paramore's Crushcrushcrush, The killers' When you were young. wow. remind me of so many things, man. Oya, went the Bert's gig ytd @ The Scape Park. That bastard's hot la. FUCK LOR. Haha. he'd betta nt b reading tis lor. THAT BUEH BAR IDIOT. tmr night he's got another event...same time same place. wil be going wif ma bestie......... Y(^-^)Y.

Okie gonna stop here. hav got FUCKING SKOOOOOL......... IIIII <----*pointing-middle-finger* CHAO PEOPLE. nites.

..*bloated/fucked-up/sore throat

..hi dere. here again.

Oya. deleted the entry made tis morning. tink tat its of no use; wil onli worsen the fucked-up situation anywae.

OK. hmm. todae: went sch, back home. am solo 4 my GAM PUA FANN ITAB project. THNKS SO MUCH YA.

stupid mixed-fruitard-with-sugar-at-the-side. cb. all of a sudden sooo hardworking. NOTE 4 U *if ur reading* : U BETTA BE REALLI STUDYING. IF UR CAUGHT DOIN SMTH ELSE........haha. u see wat i'll do ^-^

bloody fucker....dere's party nxt mth @ zouk. most prob gg. donno whether shud i keep it fr him?
HAHA. GOT U. know ur reading THIS . kla. wil ask u along. baby.

..im NOT nuts OKIE. though i do talk 2 myself sometimes =D

Plans 4 tmr: meetin babe aft his sch 4 lunch, join in the audience under ma block 4 bball, meet ZHEN REN a.k.a MY LOVES 4 dinner...go hm...revise....go online...slp.....OK. SET.

aiya sian. gg slp liao. menses damn pain. so sad huh. k CHAO everybody. tc

..To buy the truth & sell a lie.

..*YAWN*.. pardon me. im realli veri tired. shit man. stil need 2 present 4 the shitty FOM project. my god. feel lyke pon-ing tmr's ITAB. another 3 hours' routine of listening 2 chantings of a uncle hu's undergoing puberty. AIYA. nxt wk's holidae LIAO. but stil, test's right aft tat, so ...nt realli lookin 4ward to it.

OKIE. solution 4 the penise-eating crocodile question:
the 9 + 5 men wil anal each other....forming a circle ^-^

ok shut up fuckers, know its cb-tic lame.. but stil.


..nothing much abt todae...go sch, stay back discuss project...go tiong park..n now, home. trust me..my eyes r closing while im typing tis. *SNORE*

fucking BF..donno wher's he sial. msn status' bz / msg him no reply. but at least he puts his studies b4 me =D tat's a plus. retarded mixed-fruitard-with-sugar-at-the-side. wil try baking it one day. ONE DAY OK.

HAHAHAHAHA. juz felt lyke laughing.

k down 2 personal topic: ..........
had my menses todae, HAHA. guess im the onli idiot hu put tis in a blog. but WATEVER. damn pain sia. MY GOD. borrowed a pad fr agatha...a swt gal in ma klass =) THNKS AGATHA !

kk. gonna go: brush ma teeth / eat menses pills / apply moisturiser / put my tongue stud on...oya. i hav a tongue piercing =P stud's on onli at nite. *hard to talk wif it *. OKIE PEOPLE. CHAO. BB. NITE. MUACK. EEEwwwww. haha.

....phew

...hi dere. hmmm. don realli feel lyke myself. but watever shit. gonna juz record down wat happened k.
went 2 meet ZHEN REN *my love* aft sch @ great world...mis her so much tat no shit cn describe. aft tat when 2 watch hk, le wen, kel, keith with their bball & skateboard under my block. went hm 2 wait 4 hk & gang 2 change n bath *gu niangs*. went town n purple light aft tat...n nw im hm.

OKIE.SOMETHING'S NT RIGHT. IM RUNNING OUTTA THINGS 2 SAY. SHIT*.

watever.

OYA!!!! the solution 4 the question in my last post :
...................dey ANAL each other . the 1st man shall use the bottle. SOLVED ^-^
*did i mention tat im kinda sick*

k, nw's the part 2 of the question: Dey finally finish crossing the river. HOWEVER, dere's another river filled once again wif penis-eating crocodiles. this time, dere's 5 more guys waiting, pondering by the river, thinking wat 2 do. the 9 men hav no bottle left nw. WAT SHUD DEY DO IN ORDER 2 CROSS THE RIVER AGAIN? *ans wil b given in my nxt post* =D

kk gonna stop here & fucking go slp. stil hav work tmr. CCB.CHAO PEOPLE.

..damn slpy

.. wow. wif e blink of an eye, the weekend's here. wonder hw many of dese weekends i hav 2 endure/go through/tahan b4 i cn finally u-know. met my baby aft sch todae 4 dinner..missed him lyke shit. *im sry, bt tat's hw i describe*. tis wil b the last tyme i meet up wif him 4 tis wk . fuck. working on the weekend full day.

..donno WTF his PM means lor : EMOTIONAL-LOGIC=FAITH. mayb im juz brain-dead 4 the moment. mayb i've been , always. lazy 2 ask him la.

oya, btw, those of u hu's reading tis, a little question 4 u : 9 mens were hiking. somehow, dey lost their clothes & were all naked. aft a long day of walking, dey came across a river, filled wif PENISES-EATING CROCODILES. dey don eat humans, but juz their , erm, penises, obviously. dey onli hav a bottle, in which it could onli be stuff wif ONE PENIS AT A TIME. the river is like a thousand metres wide, so throwing anything from one end 2 another is impossible. NOW, HW R DEY GOING 2 CROSS THE RIVER WITHOUT THEIR PENISES BEING BITTEN OFF ?


(hint): no hint =)
..ans wil b given in my nxt post..keep a look-out til den..chao! *fucking slpy*

..my words r cold. i don wan dem 2 hurt u

hi dere..although i donno hu the fuck im sayin it to , anywaes, am back 4 nother entry =) wel if u were to crack open my head & check my brain nw, u'll notice a lotsa 'question marks' in dere. erm. cn sum1 tel me WTF had juz happened. i hav no fuckin idea. i swear to god. k. whoever's readin tis : lets juz hope tat tings r gettin betta 4 me okie. i don realli dare 2 place my bet on it. through so many things tat had happened, i finally fking learnt a harsh bt true lesson : when u expect too much 4 something, when it doesnt goes ur way, trust me, agony wil come knockin at your door. i knew this ALL TOO WELL. fucking sad 4 me huh.

..used to, n stil am,believes tat a blog functions juz lyke a mirror . it reflects watever shit im tinkin/feeling/feel like saying. . hence, dere shudnt b any right or wrong in here. so im 'so-called' , erm, NAKED here. u know, watever ur reading nw is truely wat i feel. thus, im sry if i offended anyone via my posts. was, am, & wil stil b direct in my posts =D--> fking stubborn

alright..BACK TO MY DAY : went 2 watch 'over her dead body'..kinda nice if ur one hu lykes stupid comedy ^-^ aft tat went tiong *again* 4 dinner ; had fishball noodles...no. of fishballs given were GENERIOUS ( gave two fishballs 2 ben)...went tiong park aft tat *AGAIN*. blablabla... the routine repeats itself.
....listening to ' i wont see you tonite part 1' by avenged sevenfold. Fucking addicted to it nw.

k gonna end here..finding food *as usual*.. . k bye, chao every1 ^-^

..if i juz let go of everything..wil u giv a shit ?

.. sum1 juz told me tat a blog shud b written @ e end of the day..but rmb smth : i m weird ^-^ wil juz post one when ever i feel lyke it k. so lyke any other days..its been so shitty . ponned 3 hrs of FOM klass. shiok seh . k i confess * again * : skipped it cuz i fking hate e klass. as in all the ppl. my god. nvr ever tot tat life in poly wil b TIS FUCK-UP. met up wif ben, kel, hk n went town. aft tat was on my way 2 meet up wif tat sum1.

.. im so sry, bt im a naggy person. nwadays i kept revolving ard the same topic : GETTING A TIME MACHINE. am officially a living-dead. slowly, m giving up every single thing. believes tat, when u've lost things to a certain point of time, u become immune 2 it. so wats a few more ? makes no difference at all. My sec sch's cher so rite : LIFE IS FUCKING UNFAIR. no one can find a speck of light in any aspects of my life rite nw. no one.

luv dese lyrics fr the Graduation song : memories played like films without sound. always laughin 2 ourselves, thinkin tat life's not fair. when we look back, will our jokes still be funny ? as our lifes change, come watever, we'll stil be friends forever.


Zhen Ren let me fell in luv wif tis 1 particular song : if a hero nvr comes 2 u. if u need sum1 ur feeling blue. if u wait 4 luv & ur alone. if u call ur frens, nobody's hm....if the sky is grey, oh let me know. dere's a place in heaven tat we'll go. if heaven is a million yrs away, oh juz cal me & i'll make ur day.

OKIE GUYS. shall end here. hav got CB-tic FOM project tmr in my CB-tic retarded sch. chao & tc.

FUCKING ITAB LEESON

..*YAWN* soooo fucking tired. am havin CB-tic ITAB lesson <> now. WTF man. am certain tat im nt such a morning-person after all. wat i realise now : dere's a retarded uncle talkin non-stop infront of me. >> blablablabla. as if im typing in watever crap he's talkin abt excel. HAHA. SO SRY HOR. im blogging ^-^ shit man. gonna b 3 hrs of torture. wait. i must state : IM NT USING SELECTIVE-HEARING 4 E LESSON . I M NT EVEN LISTENING.
..tink gonna hav chicken rice *again* lata. cant tink of anythin else. *YAWN* im realli dead tired. surprised im onli 5 mins late 4 the fucking klass. shud hav juz fuckin pon it.
HAHA the lecturer aka uncle juz asked me whether i understand anot . tis hw i react --> =_= *faked smile*. retarded cher. tink he stil goin' thru puberty lo. voice break EVERYTYME 'break'. ( ZHAO SIAH). sigh seems lyke wat ben hope wil nvr come true >> i nvr woke up havin a dream abt poly. I M IN ONE.
oya, i confess : i nvr wear socks todae =D *yucks* . i know its somewher in my closet. SOMEWHER. shud hav juz wore my QSS socks man~ wif its PURPLE logo on the sides. WUHOO..! k gonna end here..if nt im gg 2 run outta tings 2 say <>. CHAO every1. tc. * YAWN*

..back fr tiong park

wel. *2nd post* >> though im nt gg 2 keep on e count =) anywae juz reached hm fr meetin hk & ben. went 2 slack @ tiong park. *yawn. fkin sch tmr. absolutely no motivation 2 sch ^^ agree on gg kbox somewher tis wk ..bt seriously tinkin i go dere 4 fk lo. don know a shit abt chinese songs . K. I SHALL STICK TO MY LINKIN PARK HITS DEN ^-^ am into reggae nwadays < sigh. am findin a christian name..had my eye on EVELYN. does it realli suit me? i donno. wil carry on my search til i found e right one. k i sound as if im findin a bf. walaoeh. pardon me 4 repeating, but I'VE GOT CB-TIC SCH TMR. omg. talkin abt bf. ccb. nvmind. aiya. but am glad im stil in contact wif my fucking clique Y(^-^)Y. took a few pic @ tiong park juz nw. (posted at my frenster) haha stupid lo. k shall end here. lyke wat i said : keep a lookout 4 my upcomin posts k. chao & tc =D

My veri 1st post

hi dere (to anyone readin tis) ^^. tis my very 1st post 4 tis acc. k. slept til 12 plus todae..had lunch b4 gg work. fk man. my life's so shitty nowadays. fuckin mis my clique in sec 4. OMG i realli mis dem soooooooo much. seriously i hav no idea y i'd chosen accountancy. CCB. sry if u hate vulgarities cuz im gonna use lotsa dem in tis n my other upcomin posts =) fk the current poly im in. realli hate all e shit in dere. gosh, i'll do anythin in order 2 xchange 4 a time machine. wanna go back & fkin stay in sec 4 wif all my buddies. n lyke wat ben said, hw he wished tat one day we wuld all wake up n go back 2 sec sch, juz havin a weird dream of being in poly. WISHED. oh man. feelin hungry nw . used 2 look 4ward 2 poly kinda life, u know, freedom in chosin my outfits...meetin new ppl...shit lyke dese. i wil compromise all dese in xchange 4 a time machine. I REALLI DON FKIN MIND. wel, its nt as if e ppl i met in poly r fkers or wat. juz tat, i don realli click wif dem..if u get wat i mean. im nt 1 tat wil BLENDS in wif dem in order 2 'click'. no. tat's so nt me. i rather b myself. wel lets juz hope tat tis wuld b a passing phrase 4 me den. if nt i hav no idea hw im gg 2 survive 3 yrs in dere.
..was chattin wif gordon online when i drew him a crab claw. Bastard sia he, wan make me jealous onli. told me he went 2 hav crab durin dinner. HMMPH. WATEVER LORR. ^^. k shall end here den. watch out 4 my up-comin posts ya. chao.